just random..

One day I'd wish time would stand still, so I have more time to spend with my american friends,  and the next moment I wish time would go by fast, so I can see all my german friends as soon as possible.

It's crazy how fast time flew by. Just 10 month ago I was super excited and curious and looking forward to this year. Now it's over and yes, sometimes I wish i would've done things differently, but over all I'm happy with all the experiences I made.

In only 10 month I realized so much about life, about my life: Who I can always rely on, who never really cared, I learned to appreciate the things I've got, instead of  always wanting more and more.

Now that I look back it's crazy to see how friendships slowly built up, and now it's like I'm leaving my new best friends behind.

It hasn't only been 10 months in my life. It's been a whole life in 10 months.

And now it's only 2 more weeks until my parents are finally coming here and I kinda feel like I felt before I left home:

18. Juli 2011 - Die Zeit läuft
Jetzt ist es nur noch 1 Monat hin, bis ich ins Flugzeug steige. Im Moment ist das alles ganz komisch. Ich muss mir langsam Gedanken machen, was ich mitnehm' und was hier bleiben muss. Und dann immer dieses 'ich will dich nochmal sehn, bevor du fliegst!'. Jedes mal gibts Heulattacken bei meinen Liebsten. Eigentlich KANN garnichts mehr raus.

I gotta think about what I'll leave here, what I'll bring and what to ship eventually. I have so much stuff, I don't even know where to keep it all..

And now everybody's like: "So, you're excited to go home?" 

..and then theres my answer: "Well, of course! But it's gonna be hard to leave."

I don't know, it hasn't hit me yet, that everything is gonna be over soon.

Ok, I feel like I'm making this more dramatic than it actually is, but writing about it helps me realize how close farewell is..

And this time I don't know if I see everybody again next year. Or the year after that, because people are leaving for college..

But good thing that there's skype :)

And I already have a deal going on, if someone sends me american candy, I'll send them german candy! :)

Friday is graduation of all the seniors, they have their last day tomorrow.

Saturday is my dance recital, where all dances from this year will be performed. 

And after that we'll go up north for Ellens Cousins Graduation Party.

Sunday we'll see a practice from a jet ski race which is this summer.

Uhm, well and then theres another week. And my last weekend which I'll probably mostly spend with Emily :) ..and lets see what else will happen. :)

Sorry, I had to write this in english, cause it's just way easier for me to express myself in english than in german haha :)

And if someone need translation, just message me or something. :)

;*

9 1/2 months ago @ HH Airport

true words..

Ich hab das nicht geschrieben, aber es passt einfach total. Also wenn ihr Zeit habt, lest es euch ruhig mal durch, lohnt sich auf jeden Fall! :)

"A year has passed and now we stand on the brink, of returning to a world where we are surrounded by the paradox of everything and yet nothing being the same.
In a couple of weeks we will reluctantly give our hugs and, fighting the tears,we will say goodbye to people who were once just names on a sheet of paper to return to people that we hugged and fought tears to say goodbye to before we ever left.
We will leave our best friends to return to our best friends.
We will go back to the places we came from, and go back to the same things we did last summer and every summer before.
We will come into town on that same familiar road, and even though it has been months, it will seem like only yesterday.
As you walk into your old bedroom, every emotion will pass through you as you reflect on the way your life has changed and the person you have become.
You suddenly realize that the things that were most important to you a year ago don't seem to matter so much anymore, and the things you hold highest now, no one at home will completely understand.
Who will you call first?
What will you do your first weekend home with your friends?
Where are you going to work?
Who will be at the party Saturday night?
What has everyone been up to in the past few months?
Who from school will you keep in touch with?
How long before you actually start missing people barging in without calling or knocking?
Then you start to realize how much things have changed, and you realize the hardest part of being an exchange student is balancing the two completely different worlds you now live in, trying desperately to hold on to everything all the while trying to figure out what you have to leave behind.
We now know the meaning of true friendship.
We know who we have kept in touch with over the past year and who we hold dearest to our hearts.
We've left our worlds to deal with the real world.
We've had our hearts broken, we've fallen in love.
There have been times when we've felt so helpless being hours away from home when we know our families or friends needed us the most, and there are times when we know we have made a difference.
Just weeks from now we will leave.
Just weeks from now we take down our pictures, and pack up our clothes.
No more going next door to do nothing for hours on end. We will leave our friends whose random e-mails and phone calls will bring us to laughter and tears this summer, and hopefully years to come.
We will take our memories and dreams and put them away for now, saving them for our return to this world.
Just weeks from now we will arrive.
Just weeks from now we will unpack our bags and have dinner with our families. We will drive over to our best friend's house and do nothing for hours on end.
We will return to the same friends whose random emails and phone calls have brought us to laughter and tears over the year.
We will unpack old dreams and memories that have been put away for the past year.
In just weeks we will dig deep inside to find the strength and conviction to adjust to change and still keep each other close.
And somehow, in some way, we will find our place between these two worlds.
In just weeks.
Are you ready?"

Prom!

Hab ne page für Prom gemacht :)                                                              ⤴⤴